Set in for me this evening.
Five more days.
And maybe I should be panicked? But really I am so f&*king grateful.
I was watching Top Chef tonight, watching them trudge in for another day of challenges, and I was like, holy crap! That is me. With the trudging. Only instead of trudging in to face Padme, Gail, Tom & some random chef nitpicking me to death, it’s the sample student answers for the California Bar Exam. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE, with their 75 and 85 scores? Not me, that’s who.
It sucks that the Top Chef contestants leave their families and friends and whatnot for however many weeks to hang out in a plush Fountainbleu suite, but DUDE, I have abandoned my friends and family for the last 8 weeks to hang out in my apartment and go STIR-F&*^CKING-CRAZY. Now I understand the whole Cliff shaving Marcel’s head thing. After so long with one routine, one location, you just go batshit.
Which is where I am.
I just can’t wait for this to be over. Yesterday I was so starved for sugar, caffeine, anything to keep me awake as I trudged through Community Property one more g-dforesaken time that I drank a bottled caramel frappaccino dated Feb. 2007.
Also, my kitchen is a living, breathing health code violation. My hair is so long I am almost one of those people who you’re like, “Wow, they have really long hair and I wonder if perhaps they live in a yurt.”
PLEASE LET THIS BE OVER.
But! I cannot leave on such a horrible, downtrodden note. So I will tell you that I have (finally) made all of our reservations for Brazil and Argentina, which includes some time in Argentinian wine country, some time with the pirhanas in the Amazon, and who the hell cares what else because it at least does not involve “reasonableness” of any kind, variety, species, type, sort, genus, etc.!!!!
I HATE YOU REASONABLENESS.
If you are a lawyer, law student, you will understand my hate for reasonableness.
Otherwise, you will think I am batshit crazy.
Which is closer to the truth.